Tuesday, July 17, 2007

The ABCs of TBOE

All the nominees on The Best Of Everything, grouped the way you like them: alphabetically-- clearly The Best way to sort things.


A:

Ability to Restructure Something From An Atomic Level

Absolutely the Last Best Version of The Lion Sleeps Tonight. to Play God in A Movie Or TV Show, Best

Academy Awards, 3 Best Things You Really WANT To Know About Them

Ace

Actor Who's So Lame He's Cool, Best

Actresses People Don't Think Are Good Looking But Who Really Are, Best (List!)

Actual Best Invention Since Sliced Bread, Best

Adams, Douglas

Advice Columnist, Best

Alien Chick, Best-Looking

Aliens, Best I'm Hoping Actually Exist

All Your Base Are Belong To Us

A Long Way Down

american (example of how to be one)

Amityville Horror

Andy Richter Controls The Universe

Anthony, Saint

Anthropomorphic animal superhero, best

anyone lived in a pretty how town

Apocalypse

Apple Martin

Apple, Fiona

April Fool's Day

Art+Life (?) Month.

Artificial Flowers

Ashlee Simpson

Ashley Olsen

Asteroids

Atom, The

Author Who I Have Exactly 39 Reasons for Liking, Best.

Author Who Totally Lost It, Best

Awesome Ball

"A Wonderful Life," Rosa Chance Well


B:

Babies, having.

Bad Santa

"Bad Touch, The"

Bahookie.

Banana Slugs

Band that Captured Exactly What It Feels Like To Be A Teenager (Even When It's Not Really That Bad), Best

Banjo

Banks, Elizabeth

Bar -- the kind you walk into

Bathtub Spaceship Creation Story

Batman Movie, Best... So Far

Batman

Beatles

Beatles, again, in a different context.

Beck: "He's A Mighty Good Leader (MiniBest!)

Belichick, Bill

Beloved Children's Characters Who Are Not Quite What They Seem To Be, Best Four (list!)

Ben & Jerry's

Bell, The

Best Best Pictures And How They Could Have Been Bester (List!)

Best New Artists Who Weren't, Four Best

"Best Video On Youtube"

Best Way To Listen To Music, Best

Big Rock Candy Mountain

Billy Pilgrim in the cave

Black

Blogger, Best

Board Games, Four Best That Should Be Made Into Sitcoms (List!)

Bobby Darin's "Artificial Flowers"

Book About Monsters To Teach Kids That Monsters, And Books, Are Nothing To Be Afraid of, Best

Book I Want To Re-Read Over And Over Again, Best.

Book That I Think of When I Think of The Words "The Best Book," Best

Book That Never Existed (But Should Have), Best.

Book that Really Was Scary, Best

Book To Read In One Sitting, Best

Books Written By Felons, Best (guest post!)

Boyfriend on "Friends," Best.

Breakfast Cereal, Best Part Of

"Bring It On"

Bruce, Lenny

Bubblers

Buffalo Bills

Bungalow Bill

Buttersafe

C:

Cadbury Creme Eggs

Calvin

Candy Bar That's So Lame It's Cool, Best

Candy That's Basically Just Sugar, Best

Canners

Captain Carrot

Career An Actor Has Had After Quitting Something The Actor Should Not Have Quit, Best

Carell, Steve

Cartoon Series By Matt Groening

Cartoon Which is Good At Making Funny Barbershop Quartet Songs And Which Features A Fat Dad as A Character, Best

Cartoons Which Forecast the Future (And How They Did), Three Best (list!)

Caruso, David's Career As An Actor

Casablanca

Casey

Cash, Johnny

Catch-22

Cavanagh, Tom

Celebrity Baby, Best, Second Vote For

Celebrity Blog, Best

Celebrity I Don't Want To Get Sick of So Will He Please Just Stop Doing Things That Will Make Me Get Sick Of Him, Best.

Celebrity I Think I Could Hang Out With, Best

Celebrity Recipe, Best

Celebrity Who Remains Unspeakably Cool No Matter What He Does, Best

Census Taker

Cereal, Best Spokesman For

Character To Be The 12th Cylon on Battlestar Galactica, Best

Character, From A Beatles' Song Title, To Have Lunch With, Best.

Charleston Chew

Cheap Trick

Cheesecake Truck

Chef, Female, Best

Chick-O-Stick

Children's book, best

Choral Version of A Pop Song, Best

Christmas Is The Time To Say I Love You

Christmas, Movie

"Christmas Of Love," Little Isidore & The Inquisitors.

"Christmas Is All Around Us," Billy Mack

Christmas (Stolen by the Grinch)

Christmas, song

Christmas Song That Has Nothing To Do With Christmas But Is Still Considered a Christmas Song, and Also That Is Not An Old Standard, "Rockin' Around The Christmas Tree' "Jingle Bell Rock" or "Run Run Rudolph," The Best

Christmas Song That Is The Product of 10,000 hours of practice and is not an old standard, "Rockin' Around The Christmas Tree,", "Jingle Bell Rock," or "Run Run Rudolph," Best

Christmas Song Which Is From A Movie And Which Demonstrates That Modern Christmases Require Something Bad To Happen, and Which Is Not an old standard, "Rockin' Around The Christmas Tree,", "Jingle Bell Rock," or "Run Run Rudolph.", Best.

Christmas Song That Has Not Been Made Into A Movie Yet But Which Should (Even Though It Is Sad) and is not an old standard, "Rockin' Around The Christmas Tree,", "Jingle Bell Rock," or "Run Run Rudolph," Best.

Clap Your Hands Say Yeah

Classic Video Game, Best

Cohn, Marc

"Come Sail Away"

Commercial, Best Song From

Comic Strip That's So Lame It's Cool, Best

"Common People"

Communism

Copperfield, David (the book, not the magician)

Cornwell, Patricia

Cow, interrupting

Creepy Instrument That I'd Nonetheless Like To Learn How To Play, Best

cummings, e e

Curses!

College mascots

Colts, Indianapolis

Comedian, who's so lame he's cool, Best.

Comic book villain (Venom)

Comic, one-panel

Comic Strip To Learn From, Best

Copycat

C.S. Lewis


D:

Dan Savage

Dark Knight, The

Dava Sobel

Day to have off for a Holiday, Best

Decade, Best For Style

Decade, Best for Style, reader nominee

DeGeneres, Ellen

Detective, Television's Best

Diamond, Neil

Dickens, Charles, Best Book

Dinosaur, Best REAL

Dinosaur Pile-Up

Dirk Gently

Disney Cartoon, Best

Doctorow, Cory

Don't Be Cruel

Doonesbury

"Do They Know It's Christmas"

Dr. Manhattan

Dramatic Look, Best Variation On

Duncan Idaho

Dungy, Tony


E:

Easter Candy, Best

Elizabeth Banks

Ellen DeGeneres

Eleven Pipers Piping

Elvis Presley

Elvis, Best Version of (Lame or Cool)

Emotion that's so Lame It's Cool, Best

Espacio Sideral

Experience Second-Hand, Best Thing That Is Only Good, Really, If You Experience It That Way

Explanation for How Humans Ended Up Being Alive And Running A Planet (Best, and Only Real)

Everything Is Gonna Be Cool This Christmas

Evil

Evil Supercomputer in a Movie, Best

Explorer, Best

F:

Fairytale of New York

Fake Musical In A Real Movie, Best

Fake Musical In A Real Movie, Best (reader nomination)

Fall Line

Family Event That's So Lame It's Cool, Best

Family Guy

Fantasy Book Series Featuring Talking Animals, Best.

Fantasy Trilogy, Best

Fantasy World, Best To Live In

Fashion Accessory To Tell The World That Although You Are Smart And All, You Are Still Sexy (Tina Fey Excluded), Best

Fatboy Slim

Female Chef, Best

Fembots

Fifties, The

Fight Club

Fingertips

Fiona Apple

Flavor of Jelly Bean, Best

Florence and the Machine

Foods That Have Only A Tenuous Connection To The Natural World, Four Best (List!)

Football team

Frankenstein

Freaky Hippy Cult That For Some Reason Is Used To Sell You Stuff, Best

Friday

Fried Peanut Butter & Banana Sandwiches

Friends: The Lion Sleeps Tonight

Friends, Best Boyfriend On

Futurama

G:

Gaffigan, Jim

Galveston Island

Game shows

Gamera

"Get Your Stinking Paws Off of Me, You Damn Dirty Ape!"

Gift in The "Twelve Days of Christmas," Best.

Gimmick/Symbol In A Book, Best

Girl Genius

Gonzo

Good

A Good and Happy Child

Gossiple

Gossiple, Best...Again.

Graceland

Grant, Hugh

Grease

Green Card

Green Lantern's Ring

Green Lantern's Ring, SILVER AGE (reader nomination!)

Grinch

Groovy Instrument, Best

Grover

Guilt-Inducing But Still-Catchy and Quite Lovely Christmas Song That is are not an old standard, "Rockin' Around The Christmas Tree," "Jingle Bell Rock," or "Run Run Rudolph," Best.

Guinea Pigs

Guitarist, Best


H:

Hal

Hamlet 2

Happy Celebrity

Happy Song, Best

Heinlein, Robert

Heroes In Cinema, 10 Best According to The Boy

Hey, Jude

High School mascots

Hilton, Paris

Hilton, Paris, AGAIN.

"His Dark Materials" trilogy

Hitchhikers Guide To The Galaxy, The

Holiday We Eventually Won't Really Celebrate At All, Best

Hornby, Nick

Horror movie

Horror movie, again.

Horror movie, again again.

Hostel

Hot dogs

"Hot for Teacher"

How To Clap In Time To A Song, The Seven Best Songs To Do So (List!)

Hugh Grant

Hulk, The


I:

i

"I Am Not Your Broom"

"I am your father."

"I Don't Feel Like Dancing."

"I Kissed A Girl"

Ice cream, store-bought

Ice cream, named after a superhero

"If Love Is A Red Dress (Hang Me In Rags)"

"If you liked it then you shoulda put a ring on it."

Indianapolis Colts

Indie Rocker Christmas Song That Is Not An Old Standard, "Rockin' Around The Christmas Tree' "Jingle Bell Rock" or "Run Run Rudolph," Best.

Indie Rock Version of "The Lion Sleeps Tonight," Best

Internet comic

Interrupting Cow

Irving, John

"It's A New Year (Just Get Along)"

It's The End Of The World As We Know It (and I Feel Fine)

J:

Jack Johnson's "Fall Line"

"James K. Polk" (the song, not the president himself.)

Japanese

Jazzy Swingin' Hepcat Christmas Song That Is Not An Old Standard, "Rockin' Around The Christmas Tree' "Jingle Bell Rock" or "Run Run Rudolph," Best.

Jell-O, Lime

Jelly Bean, Best Flavor of

Jeopardy!

Jerk Store

Jesse and Joy

Jessica Simpson

Job to Dream of Having When You Get A Little Tired Of Having Your Own Job, Best

Jokes

And more jokes

And more jokes yet

Jonathan Strange & Mr Norrell

Juggling


K:

Kentucky Derby, 3 Best Things You Want To Know About (Whodathunkit?!)

Kentucky Fried Chicken

Kettle Corn

Kid Who Pretended To Be A Superhero, Best Book To Read If You Were

Knock-Knock Joke, Best

Kopp's

Kottke, Leo


L:

Lachey, Nick

Land of the Lost

Language, Best

Lead in a romantic comedy, Best

Leni

Leni, another perspective.

Lens, As Best Superhero Gadget

Linker, Best

"Like A Drug"

Lime Jell-O

Linus

Lion Sleeps Tonight, Best Part Of

Lion Sleeps Tonight, Best and Absolutely The Last Version of

Lion Sleeps Tonight, Best Version By A Group Or Country I Have a Tenuous Connection With

Lion Sleeps Tonight, Best Version of On a TV Show.

Lion Sleeps Tonight, Best Indie Rock Version

Lisa Loeb Glasses

Little Mermaid, The

Longitude

Love

"Love Today"


M:

Man To Claim World Record On Donkey Kong, Best

Manhattan, Dr.

Marc Cohn

March Madness

Mariner's Revenge Song

Mark Wahlberg

Marshmallows

Marvin The Paranoid Android

Mary Kate Olsen

Mascot, Best (two in one, reader submissions!)

Mashed Potatoes

Matrix, The

Media Scare That Turned Out To Be Not That Big A Deal, Best

Men Without Hats

Men Without Hats: "Pop Goes The World" (MiniBest!)

Merry-Go-Round

Minibests!

Misunderstood Comic Book Character Who's Not Actually A Villain, Best

Modern Song about the 19th Century, Best

Modest Mouse Song that Correctly Applies A Scientific Principle, Best

Monster At the End Of This Book, The

Monster's Inc.'s Fake Musical

Monty Python Skits

Morgan Freeman

Movie Villains, 10 Best According To The Boy (List!)

mp3 sites

"Mr. Blue Sky"

Monk Joke

Monk, Adrian

Movie Fight Scene, best: Fight Club

Movie Fight Scene, best: Neo vs. the agents

Movie line, best

Movie line, best (new nominee)

Movie line, best (new new nominee)

Movie monster, Best

"Movin' On Up," Primal Scream

Muppets

Music Craze that's so lame it's cool, best

Music for a Found Harmonium

Music Video, Best

Musical Instrument That's So Lame It's Cool, Best

Mutating Pandora Stations

"My Name Is Earl"

N:

NCAA Tournament

NCAA 2009: The 64 Best Things You WANT To Know About It (Whodathunkit?!)

Narnia Book, best

Neil Diamond

Neo (vs. all the agents)

Next Best Way To Become Famous

New Pornographers

New Bands I Just Heard Of Today For The First Time (Best) (LIST!)

Nick Lachey

Nonfiction Book About A Topic So Lame It's Cool, Best

Norton's Fight With Tyler (Fight Scene in A Movie)

Novelty Pop Song, Best

Number, best

Number Three

O:

Oh! Oh!

Onion, The (Copycat)

Oldfield, Mike

Olsen Twin, Best = Ashley

Olsen Twin, Best = Mary Kate

Orange & Cream Soda


P:

"Page 28"

Parents Have A Conniption, Best Song To Make

Paris Hilton

Peanut Butter Cap'n Crunch

Peanut Butter

Peanut Butter Twix

Peanuts Character Who's So Lame He's Cool, Best.

Pet (Best, 2007)

Pet, Which is So Lame It's Cool, Best

Phrase Which I Would Like To See Make The Jump Into Pop Culture Because of Me, Best

(The) Pigeon Finds A Hot Dog

Pink Floyd's The Wall

Pixie Sticks

Pizza

Pizza Topping, Best

Plain-Bellied Sneetches

Plant, Best

Playground Toy, Best

Play It, Sam...

Plot Twist In a Song Which Makes A Lame Song Cool, Best.

Poems That Should Be Made Into TV Serieses, Best. (List!)

Police Show, Best Episode of One, Ever.

Polyphonic Spree, The

Popcorn Chicken

Popcorn, Best Kind of

Pop Goes The World

Pop (Soda)

Postseason Sporting Event, Best

Presley, Elvis

Prometheus vs. Zeus

Proof that My Experiments Are Not Very Well Thought Out

Proof That We Need To Think About What We Say, Best

Public Service Announcment, Best

Punctuation Mark, Best


Q:

Queen song, Best

Quisp


R:

Rachael Ray

Rachel, The

Radio Ga Ga

Radio Tuning In, Best Song That Begins With

Ramones, The

Ranch Puffs

Randall Radic, Author, Guest Post!

Read.Dance.Bliss

Red Light Company

Reese's Peanut Butter Cup, Best Part Of

REM, Best Songs To Prove That They Should Stand Among The Giants Of Rock and Roll. (List!)

Remade Song That's Better Than The Original, Best

Return of the King, The

Robot In Literature, Best

Robot In Movies, Best

Robot In Song, Best

Robot On TV, Best

Robot

Robot, The

Rock Band, Best

Rock Band That Isn't The Beatles, Best

Rock Band That Isn't The Beatles or U2, Best

Rock Band That Isn't The Beatles or U2 or The White Stripes, Best

Rock Band That Isn't The Beatles or U2 or The White Stripes or The New Pornographers, Best

Rock In The House

Rock Island Rocks

Rocky Rococo

Rolling Stones

Romantic Song, Best

Romantic Song, Also considered Best

Rosa Chance Well, "A Wonderful Life."

Run, Devil Run (Jenny Lewis & The Watson Twins)


S:

Sad part in a book, best

Sad song, best

Saint Anthony

Sand Game

Santa Cruz Banana Slugs

Saturday Night Live skit, Best

Savage Love

Scary Kids' Song, Best

Science Fiction Writer, Best

Secondary Character in A Book, Best

Secret Place

Seinfeld

Selleck, Tom

Shatner, William

Sherlock Holmes Goes Camping

Showdown between Good and Evil

Simpson, Ashlee

Simpson, Jessica

Simpson Sister, Best

Sin City

Sing-Along-With Singer

Slaughterhouse-Five

Slasher Movie, Best

Sleeping Beauty

Snack food

Sneetch, Best

Snoopy vs. The Red Baron

Sobule, Jill

Soda Pop

Soljer

Solomon Grundy

Someone Comes To Town, Someone Leaves Town

Something That Really Happened, Best Movie About

Song About Girls Kissing Girls, Best

Song From The One/Two Hit Wonder "The Kings" First Single, Best

Song in Language Other Than English, Best

Song that Also Tells A Story, Best

Song that Is About Writing, or Being In, A Book, Best

Song That Is Incongruously Upbeat Despite Being About [SPOILER ALERT!] a Sobbing Cold Orphan Selling Flowers Before Dying, Best.

Song That Talks About Whether The Singer of The Song Feels Like Dancing Or Not, Best.

Song To Get You Through Hard Times, Best

Song to Play While The Hero is Running To Do Something Heroic, Best

Song To Turn Up At A Particular Point During The Song Just To Emphasize How Cool That Song Is

Song That Is Not Even A Christmas Song But Which I Am Just Going To Declare, Unlaterally, Is In Fact A Christmas Song (2008), Best

Soon I Will Be Invincible

Songs, 10 Best According to How Often The Boy Plays Them. (list!)

Songs That Show What Love Is Really Like, Seven Best (List!)

Songs That Will Make You Feel Good (and Then Feel Bad About Feeling Good), 10 Best (list!)

Soweto Gospel Choir

Spellsinger Series by Alan Dean Foster.

Spider-man

Spoken Word Song, Best

Spongebob Squarepants

Sport, Best New

Square root of negative one

Squier, Billy

Stand-up comedian

Starbury shoes

Starry Night

State Fairs

Stinky Chair Song (aka "Da Da Da")

Story Line in The Peanuts Comic Strip, Best

Summer food

Superficial, The

Superhero: Dr. Manhattan

Superhero Gadget, Best

Superhero Gadget, Best (Reader nomination)

Superhero Gadget, Best (Second Reader Nomination)

Superhero: Spider-Man

Superhero: Batman

Superhero whose powers are so lame they're cool, Best

Superman Ice Cream

Superpower, Best

The Stand

Starbuck

Star Wars (the movie)

Star Wars Kid

Stupid Questions, Best, and the Internet Sites They Lead To

Suburbs, Best Things About As Proven By "The 'Burbs" and Which Are Not As Bad As Movies And Books Claim... (List!)

Subway, Homicide Episode

Superbowl XLIII

Superhero, Best (reader submission)

Superheroes, Six Best (Reader List!)

Supervillains, 3 Best Who Deservedly Just Kept Coming Back And Should Keep Doing So.

Swing music

Switchin' To Glide

Synthesizer from "96 Tears"

T:

Talkin' Blues, Best

Talkin' World War III Blues

Talent That I Wish I Had To Make Me The Life Of The Party, Best

Teen Movie That's So Lame It's Cool, Best

Television Show Andy Richter Starred In That Had "Andy" In The Title, Best

Thanksgiving

The Man Comes Around

The Top

They Might Be Giants

Thing You Think Is A Number But Is Not, Best

Thor

Time Waster, Best

Titan Arum

Title Character in Calvin & Hobbes, Best

Tom Selleck

Toothpaste For Dinner

"Touching The Void"

Tourist Site You've Probably Never Heard of, Best

Tournament of Pets 2007

Triumph (?) over the Devil, Best... In Books.

Triumph over the Devil, Best ... in Music.

True Companion

Tubular Bells

Tupelo Honey

TV Show That's So Lame It's Cool, Best

Tyrannosaurus Rex


U:

U2

Undead Creature, Best

Urban Legend


V:

Valentine's Day, Best Song For

Van Gogh, Vincent

Van Halen

Van Morrison

Venom

Versions of my life, according to singer/songwriters, Best

Violent Femmes


Voyage of the Dawn Treader

W:

Wahlberg Brother (Judged Solely on the Basis of Their Least Cool Credit on IMDB), Best

... walks into a bar

The Wall

Wavy Gravy (the ice cream, not the guy)

Way To Make Money, Best, Apparently...

Way to Tell Is Something Is Truly Great, Best

"Weapon of Choice"

Web comic, Best

"What you don't know can't hurt you."

White Stripes, The

Whodathunkit? -- Superbowl XLIII

Wiebe, Steve

Willems, Mo (best children's book)

Winter

"Wonderful Christmas"

Word, Best New


Word that's so lame it's cool, best

World Record Confirmer

X:

Xanth

Xylophone


Y:

You

Youtube, Best Video on... that you can find by searching for "the best video on youtube."

Z:

Zero

Numbers:

1920s-1940s

1950s

3rd Planet


Other Stuff:

¿

Themes:

Showdown September (2008)


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